hah. how many times am i going to come up with a new plan?

we're moving at the end of the month. yep, that's right we're moving out of the folks house into our own apartment. it's a very nice 2 bedroom apartment. 1000 square feet. an outdoor pool. a balcony. all for a reasonable price.

this is my plan.

right now i can't commit to anything. i realize this. my anxieties & phobia are slowing down but they're still there. we're living in chaos right now.

but, come august 1st. i am back on plan. promise.

i am fat.

this needs to change.

i accomplished the 8 glasses of water yesterday.

i'm currently working on todays 8.

i did not get the job. they choose to move up one of the girls that already work in that office. her job is not being posted but is being kept open to place somebody there (ie. someone returning from mat leave, someone whose position was cut). i also learned today that the person who replaced me on my mat leave was not to their liking and has not stayed for my leave of absence. she was slightly bizarre and not up to task. interesting. i really do not want to return to my old position (hence applying for different schools) but perhaps they will now appreciate me slightly more if i do indeed have to return there? hope so.

my lovely union voted on our contract last night (which i did not know about b/c people on mat leave do not get to participate, apparently?). they passed a new ordinace saying that you have to work 12 months after your mat leave or else pay back the top up (which totally makes sense, but why couldn't they wait another little bit to pass this?). b/c i was planning to quit if i couldn't find another position. drat. now i'm stuck here for a year. sigh.

i'm totally rambling right now...this is so not weight loss focussed anymore. sorry guys.

today i will drink 8 glasses of water.

that is all.

i'm thinking about returning to this thing called weight loss. i don't think i'm ready to come back full on...but i'm thinking about it and you guys more and more. money is very tight right now with me not working and not being on mat leave anymore. S got a speeding ticket 2 weeks ago and our car seems to have broke last night. so money is even tighter now. sigh.

i went for a job interview on friday. if i get the job i probably wouldn't start until augustish but it's a pay raise and it's right by the baby's daycare. send some good vibes my way everyone. they're going to let me know on monday, either way.

the in-laws have left and i survived their vacation here. we ate out everyday for 2 weeks though. that cannot be good for my waistline. sigh. i haven't exercised in god knows how long. me and the baby have gone for some walks though at least i haven't stopped that.

i'm on the waiting list to see a counsellor through a free program at the St. Boniface hospital. that's the good news. the bad news is wait times are about 10 months. they're hoping that just after christmas they'll be able to send me an appointment time for the spring. gah, stupid waiting times.

damn those 35 cent chicken wings covered in beautiful spicy honey sauce. damn that MGD with Clamato juice. damn them all. ugh.

i haven't posted in a long time. things have spun out of control for me. my phobia has crept back into my life and i've been trying to deal with it. i'm terrified of beetles, especially beetles in my house...and well i've found a few (make that 12 in 2 months). i'm terrified to go in my kitchen b/c that's where i've found the majority of them. so needless to say eating has not been going well.

S's parents are also visiting from england so i've been very busy with them. they are totally in love with the baby and have been spending most days just playing with him. we've been eating out a lot and eating at my grandparents house quite a bit too.

my mat leave got screwed up and ended sooner than i was expecting it too. that caused a large blip in my life. it's hard to know that money you were expecting isn't going to be coming anymore.

i'm taking a break from ww and eating well. i step on the scale every once in a while and i seem to be maintaining so that's good. i don't have much to say, i just wanted to let everyone know i'm still alive and sort of kicking.

Day 2 was a disaster. i had a bad day emotionally and phsyically. i don't even want to think about it.

Food:

Chimichanga with avocado
1.5 tuna sandwiches with hot mustard and cheese
6 delicious wonderful cookies
6 cheese and kubasa and some crackers

Water:

56 ounces of water

Exercise:

Short 10 minute walk with friend after lunch

i'm creating healthy habits. i'm creating healthy habits. i'm creating healthy habits. really i am.

so i kinda went AWOL there for a few weeks. i saw success and i sabotaged myself. plain and simple.

now i'm back to baby steps.

& i'm okay with that.

Dinah's 28 Day Challenge

it takes 28 days to form a habit, so this my habit forming challenge. i don't think i've drank any water since i went awol. i haven't tracked a single food item. and my exercise has gotten VERY slack.

for 28 days i am going to:

1. track my food. i'm not going to worry about points and all that, i'm simply going to get into the habit of writing down everything that i eat and drink.
2. i'm going to drink 64 ounces of water a day.
3. i'm going to meet my monthly exercise goal of 1000 minutes in may with 2 strength training sessions a week (when i get to june i'll pick a new goal).

that's it, that's all i'm not going to worry about points and ww stuff, i'm simply going to do those 3 things to creat good habits.